Why third places matter
Amy Carpenter, 20, hiking the Camino trail after finding her perfect third place.
Third places. The living room of society. A place of genuine connection.
Even if you don’t know what a third place is, you actually do. Every good sitcom has a third place so integral it becomes the focal point of the show like the Central Perk coffee shop in Friends or MacLaren’s Bar in How I Met Your Mother. The bar in New Girl, the bar in The Simpsons, the bar in Cheers and the bar in Greys’ Anatomy. Moving away from mates having a cheeky bevvy, there’s a lot of diner third places too like The Royal Diner in Bones or Lukes’ Diner in Gilmore Girls. There’s more to third places than above spending copious amounts of money on coffee or beer, Eric’s basement in That 70s Show being a prime example.
Though these third places are seemingly all around us, they’re slowly disappearing. Perhaps a more correct way of putting it would be: our regular use of those places is declining.
The term ‘third places’ was originally coined by Ray Oldenburg in his book The Great Good Place back in 1999. He defines it as a place you go to regularly that is not your home, the first place, or your work/school/university, the second place. The main criteria for a third place is that you have no obligation to be there and where conversation is the main activity. Think of libraries, coffee shops, parks, churches, cafes, bookstores, bars, community centres, clubs, salons/barber shops, these are all common examples of a third place.
The disappearance of third places has gone mildly viral on TikTok, with one creators’ video surpassing 1.9 million views. In his video, Cole Kraten, @colethesciencedude, credits the disappearance to how expensive doing anything outside of the house actually is. And he’s not wrong. Cafes and bars are the most obviously expensive spaces as you can’t stay for a prolonged period without buying something. Places like churches sometimes cost as regular members may be expected to donate or even to get anywhere, paying for parking can get expensive (thank you Wilsons Parking). Third places are meant to be accessible, a place of human connection. As society turns towards using our time in a more productive and profit-fuelled way, third places are either seen as a waste of time or are used for means other than connection like volunteering at a community centre to build up a resume. If it isn’t genuine, that third place isn’t a third place, it’s work.
Kraten suggests that people are replacing these places with the internet, building online communities via games and livestreams, and are using social media as a cheaper and easier way to connect. To blame yet another thing on Covid-19, the global lockdown, and subsequent years of stalled in-person social connection has further morphed third places and the internet into one. Sometimes, it’s like we only have a singular place, not three. Work can be pushed into the online realm as working from home remains prevalent and some people choose to do their university courses online which makes all three places accessible through a laptop.
The issue with using the internet as a stand-in for third places in particular, is that “online communal interactions do not have the same mental and physical health effects that in person communities have,” says Kraten. In a constantly evolving world, he believes finding third places is more important than ever.
Being a student means we’re all put together in one place with a bunch of strangers with a wide set of shared interests. UC does a fabulous job at integrating students into social scenes with the largest and most diverse array of clubs on campus than at any other uni in the country. Clubs are an easy way to connect with people who share the same interests as you and sports teams especially are great third places as many have clubrooms and regular team social events.
But you don’t have to get involved in clubs or societies to have a third place as a student.
Amy Carpenter, 20, studies a Bachelor of Applied Visual Arts at Ara and takes it upon herself to take part in a jumble of third place activities.
As well as being a student, Carpenter is also a barista (and a bloody good one, I must say). She’s a regular at a few local cafes and values those small moments of connection saying, “a barista might be the first person someone sees in their day, or a really consistent person in their life and I think that’s just super cool.”
The first time a barista remembered her order, she remembers how much she “loved that, that feeling of being known [...] that feeling of familiarity goes a long way.” Her passion for hospitality flows into every aspect of her life, as she is an active member on her church’s hospitality team. The team welcomes in new visitors every week and is a way for Carpenter to “meet new people and to welcome new people.”
But one of Carpenter’s favourite things to do is go on walks and hikes. Back in November, a friend invited her to go on a small walk and from there, Carpenter was addicted, “It was never a forced thing, it’s kind of just happened slowly.” She now goes on at least two walks in a week, adding in some bouldering here, a bike ride there, keeping active and connected.
Carpenter hiking near Castle Hill.
“One of the reasons I do a lot of this stuff is because I am an introvert, so I love having not being just an ‘at home watching Netflix’ type of introvert but also ‘out doing things’ type of introvert. I love joining people in that. I’ve discovered so many things that I love like bouldering and tramping and it’s just very fun to invite people into that space purposely. I think that’s a great way to hang out and do things together.”
But third places don’t just have to keep you connected in your city. They can take you far beyond.
Carpenter recently completed part of the Camino trail in Spain with her mum, sister, and a few others in her extended family. She walked an average of 20 kms a day resulting in a total of 130 km across seven days, in what “really felt like a pilgrimage.” It was the purposeful intent of getting to the next place, meeting people you’d met along the way that made it “feel like a community.”
