lockdown lessons

We asked students what lessons they learnt during lockdown, here are their best answers:

1. “New Zealanders fucking love McDonalds”
2. “My flatmates suck”
3. “Even with 6 weeks at home, I still couldn’t find motivation to start any of my projects”
4. “Mike Hosking is a contradictory bullshit machine”
5. “My penis can take an immense amount of bashing”
6. “Pornhub Premium isn’t worth $9.99 a month”
7. “Carole Baskin killed her husband”
8. “Collectively as a nation we managed to sexualise Ashley Bloomfield” 
9. “I’ve underappreciated my hairdresser for years” 
10. “I have no hobbies that don’t include drinking and shopping”
11. “I can’t bake” 
12. “According to my dreams, there are A LOT of people I have a deep, subconscious desire to have sex with”
13. “5G caused Coronavirus”
14. “I always despised people on social media who behaved like influencers, turns out all of my friends do”
15. “I can kill hours on TikTok”
16. “My lecturer has a lovely study”
17. “I can eat a whole tube of Pringles in 1 minute and 24 seconds”
18. “I’m awesome at smoking weed”
19. “A human can live predominantly off peanut butter on toast”
20. “I am quite content not socialising with anyone”